Wish Me Luck

I’ve been thinking a lot about what I went through with my scopes a month ago. Some will know the story from This Post but long story short I was supposed to get Profinal and be put right out for the procedures. My fear is such that it will override sedation. The doc on the day absolutely refused to do so. He completely blew me off actually turning his back to me and refusing to discuss it further or answer any other questions I had for him.

He had the nurse chasing me around the room with freezing spray for the endoscopy and I wasn’t done asking questions. Doc refused to talk to me further.

This is all while Mr. CrankyPants and I are standing in the middle of a dumpy room in my gown carrying all my stuff, because apparently there were no stretchers to be found.

When one finally did come, they got me on it, and I started to cry. The nurse didn’t try to comfort me, she just wanted to shut me up to get the mouth piece in my mouth and knock me out.

For those who don’t know I warned them that my fear would override the sedation. It did. I woke up in the middle of my colonoscopy in agony. He was hurting my stomach so bad. I was promised that if I were to come to that they would give me Profinal. I’m pretty sure that didn’t happen given I could clearly hear the Dr. say and I quote, “We are almost done.” He said this twice. I remember the feel of the scope being taken out.

The pain was horrible I was rocking back and forth saying it hurts, it hurts.

The doc never came to see me after or address this.

I was sent packing from the hospital throwing up.

I’m so done with being treated like shit by the medical world. This has really done a number on me. There’s reasons I won’t go into why this is more traumatic for me then maybe some. I made the doc aware of those reasons and he still ignored me. He didn’t even acknowledge I had said anything.

I also still have a lot of pain where it hurt when I woke up from the procedure. I know I have ulcers but they didn’t hurt this much before. I wonder if the doc did damage.

I’ve had a few people tell me I should report this. I’ve had another Dr. say I should never wake up during a procedure, and I’ve had some tell me to ditch him as my Internist but he’s my only choice up here. Not that I want to see him again at this point unless it’s to call him on all this.

All this to tell you that after a lot of thought, I’ve decided to report it to the hospital.  I haven’t done it sooner because I’ve been to scared of being black listed but, I’m tired of the medical world getting away with bad treatment. I’m done letting fear stop me from reporting it.

I called the hospital today. I found out that they have a complaints department. I’m going to start there. Unfortunately, I called at 4:32 pm only to find out that they close at 4:30 pm. I did leave a message for them to call me back, and I probably won’t wait for them too. I’ll call them tomorrow.

The above situation is one of quite few up here I’ve had to deal with. No wonder people develop phobias of medical anything (Mine is bad). It’s not what they like to call “White coat syndrome.” It’s fear of being abused or blown off. If I don’t speak up, who will. Maybe I can stop this from happening to someone else.

I’m only one person but it only takes one to start the process of change and awareness. I’m scared, but I’ll make the call anyway.

So wish me luck!

Warmer Days & Rainbows,



16 thoughts on “Wish Me Luck

  1. I did a letter once when I was in the hospital and it was because of a Psychiatrist who was very rude, kept information from me etc. Unfortunately, I only sent the letter to him telling him what I thought. I had wished so, that I had sent a copy to the hospital. I don’t know if you’ve called yet, but I would suggest that you put everything in writing, both for referring to when you call, but also to say that you are sending a copy to the hospital complaints department and perhaps another department further up the chain… If you do speak to someone, have all the facts in front of you… Here’s hoping it makes a difference. If it doesn’t you can always write a review online. At least we have a physician website for allowing this in Ontario. I imagine you would have one too…. Just a suggestion… Diane


  2. I’m glad you are going to report it. Millions of us everyday are suffering abuse at the hands of the medical profession with no repercussions. And then they wonder why we are angry and defensive and blame us for being non-compliant. Chronic illness is hell already. The medical profession makes us worse instead of better.


  3. OMG! I am so sick of doctors treating patients like shit. I have come to literally hate doctors and everything medical since I become chronically ill and I was no fan of them before. Especially with incurable chronic illness, I really think they have no right to get involved. At this point I think people with chronic illnesses should just be given disability benefits and access to whatever organic food, supplements and healing alternative therapies they decide they want and the doctors should be removed entirely from our care. I am so over it. Unfortunately, because I gave up on doctors and haven’t seen one in 3 years (except to renew my MMJ card) now I won’t be eligible for disability benefits because of the huge gap in my medical records. You are literally expected to let doctors hurt you for money, if you are too ill to work, your new job is of professional victim, pincushion, guinea pig and torture victim. If you do your job to their satisfaction and let doctors torture you, even if it doesn’t help your condition AT ALL, you get disability benefits and if you don’t you get to starve to death, or be chronically ill in a homeless shelter or on the streets. What are we supposed to do?


    1. I hear you. I am on disability. I got it years back before diagnosis because I had lost my bladder and I live with extreme frequency. It was a three year battle but I got it and retro pay. It’s very little since I had been to ill to work and contribute any too ei. Mine is disability pension. Hubby is the main provider and we have a couple little business’ on the side. But yeah the medical world is so horrible. I dread every trip to the docs. I’ve been abused by them, I’ve been blown off, I’ve been misdiagnosed, and I’ve almost died on more then one occasion because of wrong meds or them not believing me/ It’s been hard since with chronic illness I spend half my life going to appointments and tests. Sorry it’s been so hard on you too.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. CrankyPants, while obviously it is your decision, I would encourage you to give up on medical treatments if you feel they are not helping you. Especially if you already get disability and do not have to constantly recertify medically, what are you getting out of continuing with the treatments? This is something every one of us will need to ask ourselves at some point if we are honest. I have seen you say that maybe you should just let nature take its course, and I have to say that I agree that this is the best course of action in some cases of incurable untreatable disease. You say you need to take a certain medicine to protect your kidneys, even if it makes you feel worse and causes other problems but do you really? What will happen if you don’t? Every one of us will die eventually, there is nothing we can do about that. There are worse things than death. I saw my younger brother be tortured by medical professionals for his whole life due to a congenital heart defect, this torture included our own parents who were (are) a doctor and a nurse. These MONSTERS and their “medical team” suggested that when he went into heart failure the last time that he be put in a Frankensteinian “suspended animation” or medical coma indefinitely until they could find him a new heart, as if a heart transplant is an uncomplicated surgery and as if he would be expected to live a long good life even with a new heart! And as if being in a medically induced coma is no bog deal and won’t cause problems of its own.
        These FREAKS think that a 50% chance of surviving 5 years is a success, even if those 5 years are spent in miserable agony with constant medical interventions and complications. I was the only one who told him the truth when he asked me what I thought, which is that it’s his choice but he doesn’t have to do it if he doesn’t want to. And he didn’t want to! He just felt like he had to. It is insanity. Pure insanity and I am SICK of it! I am so sick of doctors and nurses thinking THEY deserve to run everybody’s show because they think they have human beings all figured out. They most certainly do not.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Thank you for your kind words. I apologize for my rant. March 31 (yesterday) was the 19th anniversary of his death. I guess it was on my mind. Thank you for letting me vent, I hope it is not too upsetting for you.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I just wrote a new post about the idiotic responses I have received from friends and family when I tell them about my situation. Scroll all the way down if you just want to see that part, some of them are pretty outrageous. You might enjoy them lol Thank you for conversing with me. Have a great night!


    Liked by 1 person

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